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Da Locum Ad Interim?

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I've always been very cynical about Waitangi Day.

It amounts to nothing more than troublemaking Maoris looking for handouts and special rights; when they get them the cheeky buggers simply think of something else to protest and whinge about.

The only losers are, naturally, the (mostly white) taxpayers of New Zealand, and like Mr John Key and all thinking people I was disgusted by the so-called 'protest' yesterday.

Despite these reservations, and despite having vowed never to head 'up North' ever again in mid Summer because I find the climate simply unbearable - (I have changed shirts three times and drunk 2 large bottles of water today: it is about 400 degrees and suffocating up here) - I am in fact in Northland having spent the day at Waitangi Sticking out tongue haha!

One reason for being up here is curiosity about something I never, until today, quite believed was true - despite Rawiri assuring me 100,000 times that it is.

We live in Johnsonville in Wellington and Ra attends Victoria University - a 15 minute drive from our house - except he claimed he was getting pulled over by the Police two or three times per week, so made allowances for this extra time wasting to ensure he got to his lectures on time.

Ra said that if he drove the car in Northland we would regularly be stopped by the Police because he fits the racial profile for being pulled over: - Maori, young (only 20), male, baseball cap, and driving a brand new car (the Astra which I bought just before Xmas). So I decided to see for myself.

We have been holidaying near Pukekohe for several weeks so set off at 4am zooming up the Auckland motorway to Waitangi with Rawiri driving and me sleeping/lounging in the back seat - sort of out of sight.

To cut a long story short we got stopped at: Otahuhu, Takapuna and Albany on the Motorway, and Warkworth, Te Hana, Waipu, Whangarei, Kawakawa and Opua. Nine times in 5 hours.

Each time it was not only a licence check but ownership check - (the car being registered to my company) - and Ra sort of having to prove he hadn't stolen it; questions about what was in the boot of the "I know I don't have a warrant but if you have nothing to hide you won't mind opening it for me will you?" variety; both of us being searched for weapons (no probable cause let alone a warrant); both being searched for drugs (oh please!); being asked where the rolls of cash in my pockets came from etc etc

The weirdest experience was at Waipu where the Policeman initially thought Ra had kidnapped me! haha!

What amazed me was Rawiri took it all in his stride, accepting this as being axiomatic for young Maori men, simply part of life like eating, and begging me not to lose my temper with the Police or refuse a search or other request - ("Eli this is Northland bro: don't start the f**king libertarian shit or we will get arrested and locked up for the weekend") - and finding it all extremely funny, taking bets with me how many minutes would it take for the next siren and flashing lights.

At Waitangi we met up with some of the 'Far Now' and other friends who had all not only also been stopped a few times on their drive over from the Hokianga, but pissing themselves laughing at me - normally so composed - being somewhat shaken by the experience.

"Eli: this is Northland bro" - I lost count the number of times I heard this all encompassing reason requiring no elaboration, nor explanation.

It should also be remembered the NZ Police do not engage in a policy of racial profiling; I am sure if I wrote to the Commissioner mentioning various events of today he would write back confirming this, saying there is.... 'no such policy'Eye


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